Communication is 93% body language.. so while reading these articles, imagine that I'm staring at you air-jerking.
If you don't watch TED talks then you're an idiot
August 24th, 2014
How to land a sweet social media job in 3 easy steps
January 22nd, 2014
Proof that nuclear radiation will wipe out America within one year
January 6th, 2014
Let's quit with the 'What the fuck happened to' images.
January 27th, 2012
True Grit: Proof that Hollywood is getting lazier
November 18th, 2011
Learning Dutch - Lesson 1 - Common Phrases
October 28th, 2011
If you're sad that Steve Jobs died, you are the asshole.
October 5th, 2011
How can we most effectively end the US budget crisis and prevent a global shut-down?
April 8th, 2011
How to get your roommate to do the dishes
February 28th, 2011
I would rather have sex with any animal than another guy.
February 12th, 2011
There is no quality control in this world and nobody can be trusted.
February 3rd, 2011
Check out my hidden camera sex tape
August 24th, 2010
What is the point?
August 23rd, 2010
The best cure for insomnia
April 13th, 2010
Top ten reasons I want a girlfriend
April 11th, 2010
A very useful Text Generation API App tool.
March 6th, 2010
Tucker Max movie is the best movie of the year.
February 20th, 2010
An American girl has a webcam chat with a starving boy from Africa.
January 15th, 2010
Piss on my stereo.
December 28th, 2009
I just want to start dating an anorexic girl.
December 26th, 2009
Would you rather get fucked in the ass by a fat Chinese lady or get a Twitter account?
December 19th, 2009
Leona Lewis is an obnoxious hack bitch
November 29th, 2009
Social Networking Sucks
November 9th, 2009
We need special neighborhoods for post-developmentally disabled people.
November 2nd, 2009
More stupid annoying news stories that bother me
June 24th, 2009
Homicide and child molesting are now minor offenses?
June 17th, 2009
More information about swine flu.
May 3rd, 2009
Why are blowup dolls so ugly?
March 26th, 2009
You're not being stalked. Get over yourself.
March 18th, 2009
Bottom ten worst musicals you've ever seen.
February 22nd, 2009
My head isn't getting any wider. Stop shrinking movies.
December 17th, 2008
Why was the weed on the island so stringy?
November 28th, 2008
Stop trying to sound cool. Exclamation mark.
November 26th, 2008
Barack Obama is a goat killer and not fit to be President.
October 10th, 2008
What the hell is a Large Hadron Collider?
September 14th, 2008
Spore: Is it worth it?
September 11th, 2008
Browser Review of Google Chrome
September 9th, 2008
I should go to school for something.
August 16th, 2008
Time to stop rehashing the Got Milk slogan.
June 22nd, 2008
Ten great tips on surviving finals week.
May 1st, 2008
Things to pack on a vacation to Paris
April 28th, 2008
Things that don't cause cancer.
April 17th, 2008
Uninstall Firefox because it is garbage software.
April 3rd, 2008
All time biggest turn offs
February 19th, 2008
I am declaring war on cheese.
February 8th, 2008
Friends don't let friends put pictures of friends in frames that say Friends.
January 18th, 2008
What you should look for in a woman.
January 18th, 2008
Faces that make relatives not want to talk to you..
December 22nd, 2007
Don't bother with karma. your next incarnation is an asshole.
December 17th, 2007
Beward of global and/or local warming and/or cooling.
December 14th, 2007
Who still dresses up for halloween?
November 31st, 2007
How to be politically progressive.
November 22nd, 2007
Something must be done about jews.
September 8th, 2007
The worst experience a guy can ever have.
September 8th, 2007
Where are all the sexible girls?
August 15th, 2007
Aspects of walmart that should change.
August 11th, 2007
Harry potter fans are corrupt and unpatriotic.
July 21st, 2007
Weapons on airplanes should be mandatory.
June 7th, 2007
Finally a game that actually does cause school shootings.
June 1st, 2007
Hardcore web developers only drink one kind of alcohol.
May 12th, 2007
When is it time buy a new computer?
April 21st, 2007
February needs a new astrological sign.
February 8th, 2007
The shitty truth about girls and assholes.
January 4th, 2007
Things i hate about christmas.
December 24th, 2006
How to say, "i love you" to a girl.
November 4th, 2006
A solution to america's gas prices.
October 14th, 2006
I would rather drink period blood than have vodka and cranberry juice.
October 6th, 2006
I wanna bang ann coulter.
September 17th, 2006
Movie review: snakes on a plane.
August 29th, 2006
Top 10 funniest moments in beer fest.
August 25th, 2006
Emo is marvelous, so shut up.
May 11th, 2006
Being homeless isn't so bad
May 8th, 2006
Where am i going to sleep?
April 28th, 2006
Tool sold out!
April 25th, 2006
Why do we dump gue on our heads?
April 22nd, 2006
The life cycle of a human being
April 9th, 2006
Whats with airplane food?..
April 2nd, 2006
There are better things todo than play counterstrike..
March 21st, 2006
A million boobs.
February 21st, 2006
A guide on how to properly name files.
February 15th, 2006
Tila tequila should be shaved, ball gagged and bound in a safe.
February 3rd, 2006
I hate technology. let's all be apes.
January 25th, 2006
Girls that look like animals.
January 22nd, 2006
Reasons people wear band shirts.
December 3rd, 2005
Bam margera needs to shut up.
December 3rd, 2005
There's a seven year old killer on the loose.
November 29th, 2005
Tetris is very sexual game.
November 18th, 2005
Urinating during sex is only gross when the woman does it.
November 8th, 2005
i've decided to be a comedian.
October 31st, 2005
The difference between canada and the united states.
October 22nd, 2005
The official comedy cartoon ranking list thing.
October 4th, 2005
Margret cho is the worst comedian ever.
September 18th, 2005
Guys who like virgins are bad in bed..
September 14th, 2005
How to prepare for college.
August 23rd, 2005
I've lost it.
July 29th, 2005
Movie stores need a shitty section.
July 18th, 2005
Top 10 reasons to not get high.
July 8th, 2005
How to be really really annoying at a poker table.
July 2nd, 2005
Aliens are trying to communicate with me.
June 30th, 2005
Proof that people who use myspace are dickheads.
June 22nd, 2005
Review of revenge of the sith.
June 21st, 2005
Feminist bumper stickers i don't really understand..
June 20th, 2005
Dildolicking. and other ways to ruin a porno.
June 14th, 2005
Carmen diaz article from a while ago.
May 19th, 2005
Buy acupuncture, get one tattoo free.
May 11th, 2005
April 24th, 2005
Now is our chance to become popes.
April 15th, 2005
Awesome illusions that aren't of elephants.
April 10th, 2005
Example of when not to be sarcastic.
April 4th, 2005
I made this title long in case collegehumor.com links it, the page will be on top of their daily hotlinks list.
March 28th, 2005
Don't watch sideways, even if you aren't an impressionable idiot.
March 22nd, 2005
How come car insurance policies cover every car but our own?
March 18th, 2005
Am i the next to be discovered?
March 15th, 2005
Stop listening to music and be miserable like the rest of us.
March 7th, 2005
Sometimes i wish i were gay.
February 25th, 2005
Napoleon Dynamite (Jon Heder) died in a car wreck.
February 14th, 2005
This is how horny grommets stumble upon my site.
February 13th, 2005
Stop saying, "we scored." you are not a new england patriot. "they" scored, not you.
February 6th, 2005
My psychiatrist is a hypocritical mass of bitch.
February 4th, 2005
How to argue properly.
January 30th, 2005
Explanation for the bird.
January 24th, 2005
Bands that suck at being iron maiden
January 21st, 2005
Useless observations of reality.
December 31st, 2004
Nope, the thought didn't count. try harder next year.
December 25th, 2004
December 17th, 2004
Ipods are a trendy and expensive cry for approval.
December 5th, 2004
How to hide porno like a champ.
November 19th, 2004
Nice special effects, but why is a pack of wolves in new york city?
November 16th, 2004
Who's got the monopoly now?
November 9th, 2004
I got so voted before i drunk.
November 3rd, 2004
Don't say republicans are stupid. give them a camcorder and they'll prove it themselves.
November 1st, 2004
Ashlee simpson would like to personally thank the internet for making her famous.
October 26th, 2004
Don't vote! because it would be really funny if nobody voted.
October 22nd, 2004
Who would win in a fight: captain crunch, captain morgan, or captain jack sparrow?
October 21st, 2004
Song of the week: our lady peace - superman's dead.
October 14th, 2004
How to get girls, and other expert dating advice.
October 14th, 2004
Kitten eating a sasquatch eating a kitten.
September 24th, 2004
Websense, pick on someone your own size.
September 23rd, 2004
Help me exploit alexa and be a winner.
September 18th, 2004
Another stupid page that has nothing to do with anything.
September 16th, 2004
The time is near for a revolution.
September 14th, 2004
Views on politics and stuff.
September 12th, 2004
Seattle sucks. the pixies suck. you suck.
September 8th, 2004
Masturbating on vacation is some tricky shit.
August 26th, 2004
Volkswagen jettas are the biggest german disaster since the hindenburg.
August 13th, 2004
Thilo for president in 2028.
August 9th, 2004
Stop driving like a maniac. nobody is impressed.
August 3rd, 2004
July 27th, 2004
List of dirty restaurants that are built over rivers.
July 21st, 2004
Top 10 reasons why this is the worst article on the internet.
July 16th, 2004
Anime can make disgusting things look cute.
July 10th, 2004
Fung shui is neurotic and delusional.
July 7th, 2004
High school graduation licks balls.
June 12th, 2004
Tribute to goatse.
June 7th, 2004
If you're rich, you don't get ditched.
May 28th, 2004
Makeup sex is awesome.
May 18th, 2004
How convincing are the tortured iraqi pictures?
May 10th, 2004
How to lower the cost of your site's bandwidth.
May 7th, 2004
Free dream interpretations.
May 4th, 2004
You are not "random." shut the hell up.
April 26th, 2004
My hot pocket.
April 20th, 2004
How the dinosaurs became extinct.
April 19th, 2004
Hemp is officially reserved for dirty greaseball maggots.
April 16th, 2004
Bowling gets x-treme.
April 12th, 2004
Example of how not to build a ferret.
April 6th, 2004
Maynard james keenan did it all for yoo-hoo.
April 5th, 2004
Build your own ferret.
March 25th, 2004
An experience with my corrupt, small town government.
March 22nd, 2004
You like having fun? me too! we must be made for eachother.
March 2nd, 2004
Who is more rebellious, good charlotte or gg allin?
February 28th, 2004
Take this test to see how sensitive you are.
February 22nd, 2004
Sasquatch eating a kitten.
February 17th, 2004
How farmers can boost profit by giving cancer to cows.
February 15th, 2004
What to get your girlfriend for valentines day.
February 10th, 2004
Pads are for pussies. play rugby.
February 7th, 2004
Janet jackson's sudden career change.
February 3rd, 2004
How to be an asshole during the super bowl.
February 1st, 2004
If you have to try to be smart, you aren't.
January 28th, 2004
How to survive the apocalypse.
January 25th, 2004
Yoga blows ass.
January 22nd, 2004
How cool is masturbating in public?
January 19th, 2004
Weed is great; the people who smoke it aren't.
January 11th, 2004
News flash! mars is still arid and boring.
January 7th, 2004
The humane society of the us spent $20,000,000 to kill a fish.
January 5th, 2004
New years resolutions you'd love to make.
December 28th, 2003
December 22nd, 2003
I got a fanmail!
December 15th, 2003
December 13th, 2003
Kissing a non-smoker is like licking a rotten potato.
December 11th, 2003
Need some extra cash? torch your home.
December 8th, 2003
My big contribution to the math world.
December 4th, 2003
Which is more inefficient, 28.8k modems or skateboarding?
December 2nd, 2003
Abortion doesn't kill people. unaborted babies kill people.
December 2nd, 2003
No way, a teenage girl did not just cry!
November 25th, 2003
Braille: helping blind people out of libraries.
November 24th, 2003
Restaurant pranking stories.
November 23rd, 2003
Dammit.. twenty seven turkeys, dead!
November 20th, 2003
Utilikilts - get your freedom today, starting at $115.
November 18th, 2003
God damn hackers.
November 17th, 2003
I want to kill myself.
November 12th, 2003
Here is the documentation of all the girls i've scrogged.
November 8th, 2003
Is jesus coming or what?
November 5th, 2003
Six black men hand eminem his ass on a platter.
November 3rd, 2003
Candy is outdated, give children drugs and beer.
November 1st, 2003
Songs to not play on the piano.
October 30th, 2003
Stuff that doesn't belong in the bathroom.
October 18th, 2003
Things you never knew about your spleen.
October 16th, 2003
Movies that could have been better.
September 26th, 2003
Are you a ninja pie rat?
I have a Facebook "page?"25 people subconsciously reject my thoughts because they're so compellingly accurate.
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